Boy or Girl? The appeal of not knowing Mädchen oder Bub? Das Reizvolle am Nicht-Wissen

When my Mom was pregnant she did not have the choice, no one asked here if she wanted to know if I was a boy or a girl. Everybody in family had his or her own take and all of them thought I was to be a boy. Except my Dad. They crafted a little book and my older sisters made little drawings next to the notes where they had written down my nickname during my time in my Moms belly  (I am keeping that secret) and my weight and how many times I was fed.schwangerschaftsfoto-1

When I was pregnant with my kids I too was thinking about  if I wanted to know. And not knowing was appealing but knowing was even more appealing and everybody around me knew so why wouldn’t I want to know? You have the possibility to see if your child will have a healthy heart, might be affected by Downsyndrome and you can even do a 3D-ultrasound. So why would you not want to know?

But lets meet Elisa. I took her maternity pictures some weeks ago. She and her man decided that they don’t want to know. And they are only the first of quite a few people around me that go old school.

I love the idea and I am sure that this kind of shift of the own focus is a great thing. Instead of painting a picture for yourself what that little unborn boy or girl could or should be like you might be fantasizing about a completely different set of things.

schwangerschaftsfotos_wien-10When going back in time I remember being disappointed my first baby was going to be a boy. Don’t tell him! I was hoping for a girl. Being brought up in a household with only my sisters and my Mom I just had no picture whatsoever what it could be like with a boy. schwangerschaftsfotos_wien-9

Looking back this is stupid, because lets be honest you have to grow into being a parent anyway, right? I believe if I had not known and was going for a ’surprise baby‘ I would not have been disappointed. I imagine that being flooded with after birth hormones I would have just embraced my kid. Which of course I did but maybe this would have saved me from worrying beforehand.


And thats the thing with all the possibilities that we have, being able to get a 3D picture of the baby’s face even if we like, not knowing if its going to be a girl or a boy has a huge appeal. It kind of brings it down to the essentials: you are having a baby.

I hear that most people who don’t know in advance even forget to have a look when the baby is born  😉


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